7.02.2009
9:18 PM
Gimme apples, Post a comment.
0 apples were given.
i'm out. see ya.
7.18.2008
9:38 PM
Finals?
Gimme apples, Post a comment.
0 apples were given.
Honeslty, I don't know how to describe it.
Everything after the whole thing happend just went like a bliss of new beginning and new things flooded in. After the letter thing there came in another friend issue, after that friend drama. and everything life seems to throw at you, seems like uncatchable.
But we don't really need to catch everything, don't we? Maybe that's the reason why I didn't really felt like blogging everything that happend after that. I dunno why, but my heart just went. Just live life, you only got one of it. And right now, as I seem to recall what has happend to my last year, I can't help but smile, no idea why.
I just remebered. While I wrote those words, everything just spills. And when I read them today, I seem to relive everything. And I've never felt like I could reliv my second year. Since it's past and gone, and of course, will never be forgotten, I actually felt like I experieced high school.
Maybe it's just an act of maturity, a feeling of triumph over what you have done to yourself, knowing that every matter was settled and there's no hard feelings.
Maybe that's why we don't need to catch everything life throws at us.
Maybe it's because life doesn't throw, but rather presents problems in a throw-like way.
And somehow, I don't feel any regret. I've been thankful to the friends I made, I will really remember them no matter what, (well, okay, truth be told, I could forget them) But what matters now, is that I'm not afraid to tell "Th Cyberworld's been kind to me, the safest place I used to be."
and somehow, after all those maturity talk, as I reread the posts again, I can't help but to smile and agree to what it was saying. After everything, I still believe the childish old me is still somwhere deep inside me, just waiting for the moments when she is allowed to come to life, and to blab, to rant, to laugh, like an childish person would.
and I pray I would always feel like this, even though I know it won't
but I'm not saying goodbye to the blog world. I'll be checking in from time to time. And probably not update in the future. I have moved however. To somewhere more private. After all, after maturity comes a new set of problems to get over it, doesn't it? *wink wink*
For those who are still interested, just comment me, I'll prolly email or contact whatever way back. Tagboard is not too reliable now however.
Everything after the whole thing happend just went like a bliss of new beginning and new things flooded in. After the letter thing there came in another friend issue, after that friend drama. and everything life seems to throw at you, seems like uncatchable.
But we don't really need to catch everything, don't we? Maybe that's the reason why I didn't really felt like blogging everything that happend after that. I dunno why, but my heart just went. Just live life, you only got one of it. And right now, as I seem to recall what has happend to my last year, I can't help but smile, no idea why.
I just remebered. While I wrote those words, everything just spills. And when I read them today, I seem to relive everything. And I've never felt like I could reliv my second year. Since it's past and gone, and of course, will never be forgotten, I actually felt like I experieced high school.
Maybe it's just an act of maturity, a feeling of triumph over what you have done to yourself, knowing that every matter was settled and there's no hard feelings.
Maybe that's why we don't need to catch everything life throws at us.
Maybe it's because life doesn't throw, but rather presents problems in a throw-like way.
And somehow, I don't feel any regret. I've been thankful to the friends I made, I will really remember them no matter what, (well, okay, truth be told, I could forget them) But what matters now, is that I'm not afraid to tell "Th Cyberworld's been kind to me, the safest place I used to be."
and somehow, after all those maturity talk, as I reread the posts again, I can't help but to smile and agree to what it was saying. After everything, I still believe the childish old me is still somwhere deep inside me, just waiting for the moments when she is allowed to come to life, and to blab, to rant, to laugh, like an childish person would.
and I pray I would always feel like this, even though I know it won't
but I'm not saying goodbye to the blog world. I'll be checking in from time to time. And probably not update in the future. I have moved however. To somewhere more private. After all, after maturity comes a new set of problems to get over it, doesn't it? *wink wink*
For those who are still interested, just comment me, I'll prolly email or contact whatever way back. Tagboard is not too reliable now however.
9.18.2007
6:27 PM
screw it.
Gimme apples, Post a comment.
0 apples were given.
[music: my sniffing... :(]
[mood: not good.]
*sniff sniff*
not good.
really.
note: taglish post
I've been sick since the weekend, it's better today though, sinat na lang siya. bakit naman kaya ang sama parin ng pakiramdam ko.
no, it's not that...
it's just that... I feel different these days, like my life isn't supposed to belong here, like everybody's moving on, changing, and I'm stuck in the same state. I want to change, yet I dunno how, I know I could change, I could do things, I prolly just don't know where to start.
can somebody please help me?
nahihirapan ako mag express ng feelings ko...pero natatakot ako sa mga conequences na baka mangyari... kung di ko naman iexpress ung nararamdaman ko.... nawawala temper ko = nagagalit ako. At kung magalit man ako, un ung di magandang klase ng galit. Minsan, gusto ko na lang magpakaawa sa harapniya na tigilan na niya. Di ko alam kung naiinsecure lng ako o nagiging makasarili lang... if you could read between the lines, I pretty much think you have a better idea of what's going on. and to be gonest, I don't know why I am sitting around here writing all this stuff. I just feel like I'm going to explode.
I just don't know what to do.
you think you could help me?
i'm willing to provide further information privately...
[mood: not good.]
*sniff sniff*
not good.
really.
note: taglish post
I've been sick since the weekend, it's better today though, sinat na lang siya. bakit naman kaya ang sama parin ng pakiramdam ko.
no, it's not that...
it's just that... I feel different these days, like my life isn't supposed to belong here, like everybody's moving on, changing, and I'm stuck in the same state. I want to change, yet I dunno how, I know I could change, I could do things, I prolly just don't know where to start.
can somebody please help me?
nahihirapan ako mag express ng feelings ko...pero natatakot ako sa mga conequences na baka mangyari... kung di ko naman iexpress ung nararamdaman ko.... nawawala temper ko = nagagalit ako. At kung magalit man ako, un ung di magandang klase ng galit. Minsan, gusto ko na lang magpakaawa sa harap
I just don't know what to do.
you think you could help me?
9.03.2007
9:30 PM
Letter to Maki plus apology
Gimme apples, Post a comment.
2 apples were given.
Dear Maki,
I know I'm late, see? Three hours more and the event's finally over. and I have no friggin idea what time you'll be reading this. But anyway!
Happy fourteeth birthday! You're a young lady now, more mature, more ocnsiderate, and more pretty.... Maki, I know, I mean, we both know that there are times that I couldn't be what you want me to be. I'm sorry if I can't be the perfect bestie for you--and that there are times I'm just plain moody. In behalf of my split personality, I humbly apologize for my flaws and moodiness. I'm sorry if I can't make you smile as always, if I can't relate to some of your rants, or maybe for just being "manhid" from time to time. I'm sorry if there are times that you know... I'm just hard to understand, or just annoying. You are a great person--believe it. You are better in tons of things~ I don't think you just don't know it. But you will, and I won't go around telling you that... because I believe that the greatest pleasure of life is to know who you are. I know that you'll get somewhere someday. Yet I'm really and still thankful to Kami-sama that He has given me a friend like you. Without you, I would never think view the world as how I view is today. You helped me mature about feelings towards others without you knowing... oh, prolly. hah. Weird, I know.
We've been through a lot. You know the stuff we use to rant about? Not that I miss or I don't miss those days, but when I recall them, they just make me smile. I really really enjoyed that time with you and Hannah. Though I know I'm not that much ourspoken with what I really feel, or what I really think, I just wanna say it plainly this time. I enjoyed you. and I don't want you to forget that :) I'm sorry if I don't have a really nice gift. You know what type of person I am now... I'm not only forgetful.. i get the tendency to not really care... on the outside of course. Yet I'm very sensitive in the same way. I would keep on hoping and praying that God'll sustain and nurture our friendship, cause I know we could do it. :D
Have a blessed 14th year, nya! :D
-Truly yours,
NicA
-------
So sorry. I've been so stressed and unhappy these days. I've been keeping to myself lately... and I don't really know what to do now. wahhhh. so yeah. I prolly have to keep this journal updated over the weekend. but right. I simply have school to endure. >.>
I know I'm late, see? Three hours more and the event's finally over. and I have no friggin idea what time you'll be reading this. But anyway!
Happy fourteeth birthday! You're a young lady now, more mature, more ocnsiderate, and more pretty.... Maki, I know, I mean, we both know that there are times that I couldn't be what you want me to be. I'm sorry if I can't be the perfect bestie for you--and that there are times I'm just plain moody. In behalf of my split personality, I humbly apologize for my flaws and moodiness. I'm sorry if I can't make you smile as always, if I can't relate to some of your rants, or maybe for just being "manhid" from time to time. I'm sorry if there are times that you know... I'm just hard to understand, or just annoying. You are a great person--believe it. You are better in tons of things~ I don't think you just don't know it. But you will, and I won't go around telling you that... because I believe that the greatest pleasure of life is to know who you are. I know that you'll get somewhere someday. Yet I'm really and still thankful to Kami-sama that He has given me a friend like you. Without you, I would never think view the world as how I view is today. You helped me mature about feelings towards others without you knowing... oh, prolly. hah. Weird, I know.
We've been through a lot. You know the stuff we use to rant about? Not that I miss or I don't miss those days, but when I recall them, they just make me smile. I really really enjoyed that time with you and Hannah. Though I know I'm not that much ourspoken with what I really feel, or what I really think, I just wanna say it plainly this time. I enjoyed you. and I don't want you to forget that :) I'm sorry if I don't have a really nice gift. You know what type of person I am now... I'm not only forgetful.. i get the tendency to not really care... on the outside of course. Yet I'm very sensitive in the same way. I would keep on hoping and praying that God'll sustain and nurture our friendship, cause I know we could do it. :D
Have a blessed 14th year, nya! :D
-Truly yours,
NicA
-------
So sorry. I've been so stressed and unhappy these days. I've been keeping to myself lately... and I don't really know what to do now. wahhhh. so yeah. I prolly have to keep this journal updated over the weekend. but right. I simply have school to endure. >.>
